Husband Wife Jokes

Doctor to wife : 
Give him healthy breakfast, be pleasant and in good mood, don't discuss your problems,
No TV serial, don't demand new clothes and gold jewels,
Do this for 1 year and he will be OK.. On the way home..

Husband : What did the doctor say..?

Wife : No chance for you to survive..!! gringringrin
Wife : Dear, this computer is not working as per my Command..
Husband : Darling's a computer not a husband..!! gringringrin
Husband throwing knives on wifes picture.
All were missing the target.!
Suddenly he received call from her
Wife : Hi, what are you doing.?
His honest reply,"MISSING YOU" gringringrin
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why.?
Husband : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible,
I look at your picture and the problem disappears.

Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you.?
Husband : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself,
"What other problem Can there be greater than this one.?" gringringrin
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
so I would be in your hands all day.

Husband: I too wish that your were
a newspapers so I could have
a new one everyday. gringringrin
Wife : What is so interesting in me..?

Husband : I don't know the meaning of interesting.. gringringrin
Wife called her husband
Wife : honey where are you.?
Husband : I'm at the bank.
Wife : dear, please I need 3000 rupees to activate my blackberry,
5000 to do my hair and
10,000 to buy a dress.
Husband : Sorry, I meant I was at the "bank" of a river.
Do you want fish to cook.. gringringrin
A Husband said to his wife One day :-

I don't know how you can be so stupid
so beautiful all at the same time.

The wife responded, Allow me to explain,
God made me beautiful, So you would be attracted to me.

God made me stupid, So I would be attracted to you. gringringrin
Why husbands avoid questions.?

Wife : What would you do if i died.? Would you get married again.?
Husband : No.!
Wife : Why not.? Don't you like being married.?
Husband : Of course i like.. but.!
Wife : Then why wouldn't you remarry.?
Husband : Ok, ok, i'll get married again..
Wife : Would you live in our house with your new Wife.?
Husband : Yes, it's a great house..
Wife : Would you let her drive my car.?
Husband: Yes, it's almost new, dear..
Wife : Would you give her my jewelry.?
Husband : No.. I am sure she would want her own..
Wife : Would she wear my shoes..?
Husband : No, her size is '6'
Wife : silence
Husband : shiiit..!!

That's why..! gringringrin